


The BFF Club

by posingasme



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-08-29 10:41:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8486233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/posingasme/pseuds/posingasme
Summary: Jo is excited about a visit from an old sorority sister. But she may have told Charlie she was seeing a man, which would be awkward enough since she isn't, but it's especially inconvenient since Jo hasn't even told her she's gay. So she ropes her bestie Sam into playing her fake boyfriend. Because that always ends well.





	1. The Fakes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Zetal (Rodinia)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/gifts).



> My take on Z's prompt: I told my sister I had a boyfriend, so please pretend to be my boyfriend, because she's coming to visit...for Sastiel.

Sam blinked at his old childhood friend. “Jo...you're a lesbian.”

She glowered at him. “I know that! And everyone here knows that! But Charlie doesn't know it!”

“Okay. So tell her.”

Jo’s hands flew up in exasperation. “Sam, you are the least helpful best friend a closeted lesbian could possibly have. You know that?” 

He frowned. “That's entirely unfair. I once set you up with my brother to prove to you that you're gay.” He shrugged. “For that matter, why not ask him?”

She sighed and dropped onto a barstool. “Because it would be weird. Hey, Dean, remember how I was totally infatuated with you as a teenager, and then you finally went out with me, and I completely freaked out when you tried to kiss me, and blathered about how it wasn't you, it was me? So how about we pretend to be dating for a weekend, and then I can run away and never meet your eyes ever again?”

“He understood.” 

“Sam!” she whined. “Please! I'm asking for a favor! How often do I come to you for a favor?”

Sam's eyebrow quirked. “You had me move furniture at your apartment just last week.”

“Okay, but other than-” 

“A week before that, I had to come pick you up three hours away because you were too drunk to find your truck in an empty parking lot.”

“Sam-”

“I fed and walked your dog for six days when you forgot to kennel him before driving your latest disaster to rehab on the east coast.” 

“She's not a disaster! Starla’s just…” 

Sam sighed. “Her name was Starla, Jo. I don't even think Dean would have picked her up for the night, let alone checked her into a clinic.”

The whole conversation seemed to make Jo thirsty. She grabbed the entire bottle of whiskey, and smirked at Ellen when she rolled her eyes. “You don't want me to drink too much, make Sam shut up,” she called.

Her friend leaned on the bar and stretched. “You made me take that yoga class with you this summer because you thought the instructor was hot, and you wanted me to help you get up the nerve-”

“Okay! Okay, fine! I ask for favors! I'm asking another one! Just add it to the list, jackass!”

He closed his eyes briefly. “Okay. Sure. Why not? Awkward gay dude with a cute lesbian. Do I get to tell people I dumped you when the time comes?”

“You do not.”

“You're not exactly sweetening the deal.”

Jo kissed him on the cheek. “Your reward is a lifetime supply of bearding for you.” 

“That isn't something that comes in a lifetime supply, nor is it something I need. I'm not in the closet. I'm single and dorky. That's not the same thing.”

“Oh. A lifetime supply of pep talks when you pretend like you're going to go ask a guy out?”

“Yes. I'll take that. And you need to make me think you really believe I'm going to this time. Like, act surprised when I chicken out. That's what a real friend would do.” 

She kissed his other cheek. “I promise to be shocked by your cowardice.”

“Thank you.” He sipped at his drink, then lifted his phone. “So? What's our story?” 

“What story?”

“God, Jo. Haven't you ever lied before? We need to get our story straight! What happens when this lovely, clueless sorority sister of yours asks how we met?”

 

***

 

“So this is Sam!” the redheaded whirlwind cried out. She threw her arms around the guy immediately. “How did you two meet?”

Castiel stepped back and let Charlie do her thing. He had built up a tiny layer of immunity against her adorableness, so he stood boredly off to the side while she reeled in everyone else with her charisma. Castiel was not charismatic. Not at all. He was weird. He didn't mind being weird, but it was inconvenient at times. Charlie was weird too, but in a cute way. Castiel was weird in the accidentally creepy way. It was best to just back off and let her go.

But of course she couldn't let him do that. As soon as the meet-cute story had finished, she turned to him. “And this is my-my boyfriend, Cas.”

He really hated this. 

Jo squealed a little. Why did girls do that? “So good to meet you!”

Castiel didn't bother listening to how he and Charlie had met. It was pointless. It wasn't the real story at all. They had met at a party, and realized partway through that they were both hitting on the hostess. Neither of them had succeeded in getting her attention, but they had become instant best friends. He had told her about his long line of ex-girlfriends and the two ex-boyfriends, and how they had all ended the same way: disastrously. She had lamented the sad lack of women who wanted a serious relationship, but confessed to her own ironic commitment issues. It was a mutually beneficial support group of two.

And then came the legendary Jo Harvelle.

Castiel already didn't like her. Not that she wasn't friendly and kind. But because of her, Charlie had cashed in her chits.

“Cas, please! She's my oldest friend!”

“What about Kevin? Didn't you two go to preschool together?”

Charlie amended her statement. “Cas, please! She's my hottest friend!” 

“Kevin's cute.”

“Castiel! I helped you ask that bitch Meg out, and when she clawed your heart out and ate it, I nursed you back to health, and didn't even say I told you so. Which I totally did.”

“Okay, fine. But for the record, you've said you told me so every day for months.”

She shrugged. “Because I did.” 

“All right. I'll be your boyfriend. I just don't get why. You're out! You've been out as long as I've known you!”

Charlie paused their video game and turned to him. “Because she doesn't know. I never told her. I shared a room in the sorority with Jo. I guess I thought it would make her uncomfortable to know she lived with a lesbian. And every week that went by without me telling her just made it that much closer to never being able to. But she's so wonderful! And I want to do this trip, to be with her again, but I told her I'm dating a guy, and...and that's going to have to be you.”

Castiel sighed. “How can you be friends if she doesn't even know you?” 

She bristled a little. “Cas, there's a lot more to me than being gay. And there's a lot more to a friendship than knowing who the other person wants to sleep with.”

“That's what our friendship is based on.”

Charlie popped a gummy worm into her mouth and restarted the game. “Yeah. Because we are compatibly pathetic.”

“I don't have to kiss you, do I?”

“Ew! No! Now come on. We have to get our story right.” 

“Our story!”

“Yeah! God, Cas! Haven't you ever lied before? We have to have a meet-cute story!”

“You're using words, but they seem to be unrelated or out of order.”

Charlie sighed.


	2. Tangled Webs

The second time Jo kicked his shin under the table, Sam considered leaving her to her fate. By the third time, he was ready to kick her back. The fourth time, he did.

Charlie looked up at the yelp from her friend. “You okay?”

“I'm awesome,” Jo sighed as she leaned down to rub her leg.

Sam smiled at her sweetly. He might've had something bitchy to say, but Castiel met his eyes at that moment, and he lost his ability to speak.

Jo took his hand in a parody of a loving gesture, and held it in a crushing grip. “Sweetie, can I talk to you for a minute?”

Sam blinked out of the trance those ridiculously blue eyes held him in, and nodded. “Anything for you, dear.” 

The moment they were out of sight of the table, Jo punched him in the gut.

“Oh!” he barked out.

“What the hell are you doing?" 

He glared at her while grasping at his belly. “Why the hell are you so violent?”

“Because you're supposed to be my boyfriend, and you're making eyes at my best friend's boyfriend!”

Sam stood tall again, and glowered at her in indignation. “First, _I'm_ your best friend! I've earned that title a thousand times over just in the past twenty minutes!”

She sighed, and gave him a small nod. “I like that you made that your first point.” 

The lawyer smirked at her, and continued. “Second, I am not making eyes at anyone. But if I were...have you _seen_ his damn eyes? And heard his voice? Are we sitting at the same table? If you weren't the worst actress I've ever met, I'd be certain I was being punked!”

“What?” 

“Jo! That guy stepped out of the best dream I've ever had! Have you even looked at him?”

“I saw him!” 

Sam snorted at her. “Yeah. You saw him. You've been glaring at him even more than me all through lunch.” 

She sighed miserably, and buried her face into his chest. “Can you blame me?” she wailed. “I tried telling myself that Charlie couldn't possibly be as great as I remembered. But she is. And I hate myself but I can't help hating him too.”

Her friend let out an echoing sigh and wrapped his arms around her small frame. “God, Jo. Why are you doing this to yourself?”

“I think I just _said_ I hate me,” she mumbled into his jacket.

He rubbed her arms. “Well, clearly you hate me too, because I'm going back there, and I'm going to be your boyfriend while trying not to stare at the hottest guy I've encountered ever.”

At last, she looked up at him, sniffing a bit. “He's not even that good looking.” 

“He's otherworldly.”

“If by that you mean he's kind of weird and would make any normal human a little uncomfortable with the way he seems to be at least part alien, then yes. I agree.”

“You're so gay.”

She shrugged. “Not exactly news. But seriously. He isn't freaking Jensen Ackles.” 

“I don't know who that is, but I'm going to argue with you anyway.” 

“Hold my damn hand, and stop staring at the alien boy.” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

***

“You think she's okay? She seems so uncomfortable. She and I just don't mesh the way we used to.”

Castiel cleared his throat. “You're worrying too much. I don't even know why you're worrying at all. You clearly have no intention of any long-term friendship with this girl.” 

“What?”

“Charlie, this is someone you enjoy, but who you wouldn't even invite to your own wedding. Do you realize that? If one day you decided to tell her the truth, do you think that would be the end of your friendship? Because if it would be, why are you even friends?”

The redhead closed her eyes and flinched under his words. 

“I just don't get it. I've never known you to hide any part of yourself. Except your story about your mom. And you said Charlie knows that. So why doesn't she know this?”

Charlie sniffed a little. “Just get me through this weekend, please.”

Castiel felt his heart lurch. He had never heard his friend sound so defeated. He took her hand, and kissed her cheek softly. “Of course. I don't approve only because I love the real you, all of you.” 

She smiled at him gratefully, and cleared her throat. “Of course you do. I'm awesome.” Then her eyes narrowed. “But you've got to stop watching Sam. You're making him uneasy.”

Now he sat back. “I'm not watching him.” 

“You so are. You're doing your creepy stare.”

“Stop saying that! I'm not creepy!” 

“You're not creepy. But you seem creepy when you do that.”

“I'm not doing anything!” 

She picked at her grilled chicken salad. “Just don't scare him off with your bi vibes.” 

“I don't have vibes.”

“You so do. He's hot, and you're into him. Stop it.”

Castiel threw his hands up and shook his head.

“Now you're sulking.”

“I am not!”

“You know who whines, Cas? Babies. Babies whine.” 

“You're a bitch, and I don't like you.”

“I know.” 

He tried. But when the giant walked back to the table with an arm around his girlfriend, it was so hard not to stare. He was certain he had never seen such a beautiful man in his life. Except Jensen Ackles from Dark Angel. That guy was hot. This Sam guy was incredible. Stunning.

 And entirely gay.

Castiel was curious as to whether he was the only one of the four who knew that. Sam himself seemed to be in complete denial. He was fawning over Jo like a kid who wasn't sure which end to use, but was determined to make it all work. Charlie was far too busy pining over Jo to notice. And Jo was...Castiel wasn't sure what Jo was. She seemed nice enough, but since he blamed her for having to do all this, whether or not that was fair, it was hard to like her. On the other hand, she didn't really strike Castiel as someone who wouldn't be able to fit Charlie's sexual identity into their friendship.

As usual, Castiel didn't understand anything that was going on. 

Charlie jabbed him in the ribs.

“Uh, sorry, what?”

“Jo was asking what you do.”

Castiel wasn't sure why Charlie couldn't answer that for him. “I'm an ophthalmologist.”

“The kind who fixes teeth?”

Sam looked at his girlfriend with exasperation. “That's an orthodontist! Ophthalmology is eye care.”

“Excuse me!” Jo shot back. “Not all of us got a perfect score on the SATs, nerd!”

“Sure, because some of us were a little too drunk that day.”

“One of us isn't drunk enough right now, smartass!”

“You'd think you might've gleaned some medical terminology from all your late nights with Cara Roberts.” 

Jo’s mouth dropped.

Sam took in his breath too quickly. “Carl. Dr. Carl Roberts. The-the guy med student who…” 

The table was silent. Castiel and Charlie exchanged glances.

Jo laughed in a nervous way. “I'm so proud of how smart you are, sweetheart,” she ground out through clenched teeth.

“I'll try not to remind you of it so often, dear,” Sam growled.

Charlie looked from one to the other, and jumped in. “Cas is an eye doctor,” she said a little shrilly. “For people's eyes. It's totally boring. Tell a story, Cas.”

He frowned. “It's pretty boring.”

“See?” Charlie confirmed. “But being a game designer, that's awesome. And I have got stories! Don't I?”

Castiel sighed. “She's got stories.” 

“Right. So there was one time at a conference…” 

He nodded at the right places, but his mind and gaze drifted away. They landed squarely on Sam, who wouldn't meet his eyes. 

The lunch wasn't getting any better. But it was beginning to get a little more interesting.


	3. Wheel Keeps on Turning

For the record, Sam had seen every episode of Gilmore Girls. He knew how straight couples acted. He had just never been part of one before. And he was Team Jess, for whoever needed to know. That Dean kid had lost his trust, and didn't deserve her, and he was kind of dorky too. Jo was firmly Team Stop Waiting for a Man to Make You Happy. But that was because she was Jo.

“Dear, are you sure you haven't had enough? Wouldn't want you to go forgetting anything,” he hissed. 

“Shut up, sweetheart,” she whispered back. “I'm going to need more than this to get me through tonight.”

He sighed. 

Castiel was watching him again. At last, he seemed to make a decision. He ordered two beers in the bottle, and stepped away from the bar to approach them. “Jo, Charlie wanted to regale you with more of her stories. I thought maybe Sam would join me for some darts while you ladies catch up.”

 

Sam had rarely seen Jo move so fast. He shook his head at her. Then he took the offered beer, and smiled wearily. “They're something, aren't they?”

Those intense eyes were on him, as if they would see straight into his mind. “They are. Something.” He smiled then, and led Sam to the darts board. He pried a fistful from the target, and collected the rest, then separated them carefully before handing Sam his.

“Gotta warn you. I'm good.”

Castiel gave him the ghost of a smile. “I'm not surprised.”

They were fairly evenly matched, as it turned out. By the time they got to best-three-of-five, it was apparent that Castiel was as competitive as Sam was skilled. It was the first bit of fun Sam had experienced all day. 

Then, at best-four-of-seven, Castiel utilized a new, brutal strategy. He took off his jacket. 

Sam's dart went wayward the moment he saw Castiel's arms in that tee. The next time he went to throw, Castiel stretched to place his hands behind his head, showing off strong arms and a tiny sliver of flat belly that could be seen above his belt as his shirt lifted. Needless to say, Sam barely hit the target at all. Then, in his final throw of game six, Castiel had actually winked at him. There was no chance.

It was embarrassing. At least there was no money on the table. But Sam had been a darts champion at Ellen's for as long as he had been tall enough to see over the bar. This wasn't the Roadhouse, but a different target shouldn't matter. Not unless that different target came with an infuriating, smirking opponent.

Game seven ended abruptly when he was lining up to throw, and Castiel gave a sensual sigh entirely too close to Sam's ear. The dart had bounced right off the board instead of sinking in. 

Castiel smiled at him in triumph. “Too bad,” he teased. “I was worried you might tie things up. You're good. It would be fun to play with you instead of against you one day.” 

Sam groaned. This man was going to be the death of him. Why couldn't Jo have asked Dean to help? “Yeah. We should play two on two against the girls one day.” 

“That's the plan,” Castiel said quietly.

He shrugged and tossed back the last of his beer. Being near this guy was exhausting. Sam was bad enough at flirting. Trying not to seem interested in a straight guy was just a whole new level of failure. “Hey. I gotta make a call. Then I'll kick your ass at some pool to redeem myself.”

Castiel smiled. “I'll get my stick ready for you.”

The guy was killing him. 

“Hey. What's up?”

Sam leaned on his car in the parking lot and groaned into the phone. “Dude. I'm so screwed.”

“Why? What happened?”

“I'm bearding for Jo.”

“What? What the hell? Why?”

He let his forehead drop into his palm. “I don't even know. An old college buddy visited her, and she wanted to avoid telling her, and so she dragged me in...But this isn't just-Dean, Jo loves this girl. Like, she's in love with her. I've never seen her like this before.”

“Jo fell for a straight chick in college, and now she needs you to pretend to be her boyfriend so she doesn't have to admit she's gay, let alone in love.” 

Sam smiled. “Thank you for catching on quickly.” 

“I do what I can.” 

“But there's the friend’s boyfriend. He's...The four of us had lunch, and now we're at a bar, and…” 

“Sam, do not fall for the straight chick’s boyfriend.” 

He groaned into his hand. “Caught on to that pretty quick too, didn't you?”

“I know my kid brother. You always aim for what you can't have, then you tear yourself up because you couldn't reach it. Of course you're falling for him. The guy is straight. He's the least likely person in the room to want you. Sounds like your type.”

“He's…” Sam stopped. “Maybe he's not.” 

“Sam-”

“Thanks, Dean!”

“But you didn't-”

He hung up and took a deep breath. “He's not.”

When he returned to the bar, he walked past the table where the girls were sitting. He watched them with a fresh eye and a creeping smile. Charlie was talking animatedly, beaming at Jo every time she laughed at something she said. She was touching Jo’s hand now and then, as though she couldn't help it, and Jo smiled happily each time.

Sam began to grin. 

He made his way to where Castiel was leaning against the wall with a pool cue in his hand. He smirked at Sam.

“So...I need some advice,” he laughed.

Castiel shrugged. “How can I help?”

“Thinking of leaving my girlfriend.”

“Oh? Is she interested in someone else?” Castiel teased.

“It's complicated.”

“I see. So what's the problem?” 

Sam took a deep breath. “I’m leaving my girlfriend, but I'd really hate to be lonely. Third wheel, you know.”

“Third wheel adds stability. Especially if it is paired with another third wheel, making two pairs.”

“That's just what I thought.”

Castiel smiled.


	4. Charjo and Sastiel

Castiel was not clear on any sort of plan going in. Sam had just smiled and told him to follow his lead. Castiel had mumbled something about being happy to follow, because the view was excellent behind Sam, and the lovely blushing grin he received was fair reward. 

“Jo? I'm sorry. I can't keep this up.” 

Jo turned, startled, to find both men standing over the table where she and Charlie were laughing together. She sucked in her breath sharply. “What? Sam!”

“Charlie, I too would like to extend an apology. I will need to terminate our arrangement.”

The redhead’s eyes widened in horror. “Cas, what are you doing?”

He gave her a sympathetic smile. “I'm dumping you,” he explained. 

Jo stared. “What? Just like that?” She stood drunkenly and squared her small frame with Castiel's large one. “You're kidding! Don't you realize what you've got here? She's-You're an idiot!” 

“Jo, it's-” 

“She's gorgeous!” 

Charlie stopped. She gave a little smile and shrug. “Well, I can't exactly shut this down.” 

“See?” Jo stabbed a finger at Castiel's face. He wasn't sure if this was going according to plan or not. “You're an idiot! She's brilliant! She's the most amazing human on the planet-She's a damn queen!” 

“Actually, I kind of am a-”

“If I had the chance you had, I'd never let her go! I'd give her everything! I'd be everything she ever needed! Do you even know what you're throwing away?” To everyone’s shock, Jo suddenly burst into tears. “You're throwing away everything I've ever wanted! What the hell is wrong with you?”

Sam hurried to put her arm around his friend. “Joey, wait. Stop.” 

“Why does he get to hurt what I'm not even allowed to love?” 

At that, Charlie leapt to her feet and shoved in to hold Jo herself. “Hey! Hey, JoJo. Say that again. What you said? Do you mean that?”

It was clear Jo had no recollection of what she had said, but she nodded anyway. “I always mean what I say,” she swore.

Sam sighed. “Except when she's telling you she's straight. Because she's definitely not.”

“Except that,” Jo agreed. “Wait, what?” 

Charlie gave a high-pitched squeal.

Castiel groaned. He didn't know why girls did that.

The foursome broke up quickly after that. Charlie insisted on being the one to help Jo get home, so that she could be the one to explain everything when she was sober. Sam took Charlie aside, and Castiel watched as his friend's eyes sparkled. She threw her arms around him in a bone-crushing hug, then slugged him in the arm. She returned to kiss Castiel on the cheek. With some effort, she was able to convince Jo to stop threatening to hurt Castiel, and the two of them disappeared from the bar.

Sam paid the remaining tabs with a sigh. “That's definitely going on my top three weirdest dates list.”

Castiel turned to him with a dry laugh. “Made at least my top five.”

The handsome lawyer smiled at him. “So? I'm dying to get to know the real you. Would it move this up to your top three if I asked you back to my place tonight?”

He chuckled softly. “Definitely weird to hang out with my ex-girlfriend’s girlfriend's ex-boyfriend. But I'm certain I could overlook that aspect.”

“What's the etiquette here?” Sam teased in a shy tone. “Do I have to ask Charlie's blessing?”

“Trust me. Charlie is counting her blessings right now, and the last thing on her mind is whether or not you're moving in on me.” 

“Maybe the two of them were just scheming to get us together.”

Castiel smiled at the idea, and took Sam's arm as they walked out into the parking lot toward Sam's car. “I think there were far simpler ways to do that. Besides, I don't need to be set up. I'm extremely smooth.” He began to laugh, and turned to face Sam. “Hi,” he said. “I'm Castiel. I'm an ophthalmologist, and I know great eyes when I see them. And I also know vision, and you are one beautiful vision.” 

“That's horrible. I'm so glad I met you while you were already dating someone else. If you'd tried to pick me up on your own, we never would have gotten so far.”

“But now?” 

Sam grinned at him, and advanced to pull him into a kiss he had fantasized about all day. It was just as delicious as he had hoped. He stood back and licked his lips. “Now I'm really glad it isn't Jo I'm taking home tonight.” 

“I certainly wasn't expecting the night to go like this. Not prepared. You have protection?” Castiel asked quietly.

He snickered. “I've got two dogs.” Sam laughed at Castiel's expression. “Yes, Cas. I have protection.” 

His smile returned. “Then lead the way.”

It was the easiest hookup of his life after that. Having spent the afternoon and evening lying to one another, then seeing through to the truth, it seemed entirely unnecessary to pretend anymore. They were free to be themselves, in a way neither had truly felt comfortable being before. They laughed while they touched, and it made all the difference. By morning, they were in deeper with one another than either had ever been with anyone else.

“Sam?” he murmured into the man's neck after a comfortable silence.

“Hm?”

“Does this count as a meet-cute?”

“I don't know what that means.” 

Castiel smiled happily. “Good,” he responded, and burrowed his face into the man's soft hair.


End file.
